I LOVE snow days.
Monday, February 8, 2010
Saturday, February 6, 2010
A Little Bit Psycho
Yep. That's me sometimes. I get hot and bothered about something, and I react. I live very emotionally. Not so much ever logically. I definitely tend to jump before I think. This lovely characteristic of mine has had some repercussions, but I think it's just part of my story. Each time I have reacted too rashly, I've had to wait for time to slowly heal the gouges I've caused in relationships, finances, life's purpose...I own it, and I'm working on it.
In C.S. Lewis's Chronicles of Narnia series, when the characters don't understand the attitudes/actions/injustices of another's life, Aslan (the lion) often counsels them in saying, "That's his (or her) story." In other words, don't try to understand or judge. Everyone has their individual journey of faith, and God deals with each person differently. That idea has been very liberating for me. When I consider my circumstances at any particular moment or the circumstances of others around me, it is such a load off my shoulders to realize that I don't have to worry about it. That's God's job. All I have to do is stay focused on Him, and he'll carry that load. When we own the fact that each of our stories is unique, our judgments have to turn inward. We can no longer point at someone else's flaws. That's God's story with that person, so we in turn have to look inward and question our own stories.
I do believe I digressed. So back on point, my greatest regrets are the hurtful words I've spent toward people I love. In my heated reactivity, I have carelessly wounded beloved friends and family. If you are reading this and you are one of these people, I'm sorry. I've had my ugly moments, and those make me sad.
BUT, life is so good, so beautiful, so abundant, so sweet, and I am so thankful. I love my God with all my heart, and I try every day to give my everything to Him. What's your story?
In C.S. Lewis's Chronicles of Narnia series, when the characters don't understand the attitudes/actions/injustices of another's life, Aslan (the lion) often counsels them in saying, "That's his (or her) story." In other words, don't try to understand or judge. Everyone has their individual journey of faith, and God deals with each person differently. That idea has been very liberating for me. When I consider my circumstances at any particular moment or the circumstances of others around me, it is such a load off my shoulders to realize that I don't have to worry about it. That's God's job. All I have to do is stay focused on Him, and he'll carry that load. When we own the fact that each of our stories is unique, our judgments have to turn inward. We can no longer point at someone else's flaws. That's God's story with that person, so we in turn have to look inward and question our own stories.
I do believe I digressed. So back on point, my greatest regrets are the hurtful words I've spent toward people I love. In my heated reactivity, I have carelessly wounded beloved friends and family. If you are reading this and you are one of these people, I'm sorry. I've had my ugly moments, and those make me sad.
BUT, life is so good, so beautiful, so abundant, so sweet, and I am so thankful. I love my God with all my heart, and I try every day to give my everything to Him. What's your story?
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Amber
I reconnected with my bestest friend today. She is such a piece of me in such a profound way. Most people in life are just passing faces as we move from season to season, but a few take a piece of you if they go. My friend is like that. There is a piece of me that is only complete when I have her. I love you, Amber!!! You are my strong, funny, smart, resilient, beautiful friend.
Monday, February 1, 2010
M.A.S.H.
Organizing life makes me tired. Right now I need to be doing oh so many purposeful daily things, but I am avoiding them. So, I blog. I blog with no reason for blogging. Nothing to say really. Just sitting here considering the minor details in my corner of the universe...
Actually, truth be told, I am stuck in a fever of anticipation. But it's not hyper anticipation. It's very lethargic. Like my mind could be so busy and occupied in so many different directions that it's easier just to be still and think nothing. Do nothing. Yep. Nothing feels good. I like it.
But nothing won't last. Soon I will drag my booty up and clean the kitchen, do some laundry, pick up the living room, bathe my children, read to my children, put my children to bed, grade papers, write out birthday invitations, read some books...and hopefully all before about 10:30. That gives me 3 hours and 25 minutes.
But my lazy anticipation, I'm afraid, is here to stay for awhile. It's like hovering over the edge of a cliff with a parachute ready to jump. I know I'm going to do it, but I'm nervous. I'm hesitant. I think I'd prefer rappelling. I know. That metaphor doesn't really make sense, but it does.
So what's all the convoluted writing about? We. Are. Building. A. House.
Actually, truth be told, I am stuck in a fever of anticipation. But it's not hyper anticipation. It's very lethargic. Like my mind could be so busy and occupied in so many different directions that it's easier just to be still and think nothing. Do nothing. Yep. Nothing feels good. I like it.
But nothing won't last. Soon I will drag my booty up and clean the kitchen, do some laundry, pick up the living room, bathe my children, read to my children, put my children to bed, grade papers, write out birthday invitations, read some books...and hopefully all before about 10:30. That gives me 3 hours and 25 minutes.
But my lazy anticipation, I'm afraid, is here to stay for awhile. It's like hovering over the edge of a cliff with a parachute ready to jump. I know I'm going to do it, but I'm nervous. I'm hesitant. I think I'd prefer rappelling. I know. That metaphor doesn't really make sense, but it does.
So what's all the convoluted writing about? We. Are. Building. A. House.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Nemesis:
Since my husband (and the rest of my family who are becoming aware of my resolution) prefer to reach me in a more expedient manner than snail mail, I'm giving in on no cell. Boo. I seriously don't like this little creature, but I do love my family, so I give.
I will try to nurture it and keep it alive, but something deeply subconscious in me will undoubtedly cause continued abuse and neglect. But go ahead. Call me.
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