Moving Forward

On Saturday, November 17th at 4:30 a.m. after dreaming about my results all night, I finally got out of bed to see if scores were posted.  I entered my username and password and then covered my eyes.  I peeked through my fingers, and......I'd typed the wrong password.  So, I tried again, covered my eyes, peeked, and....."Congratulations, you are a National Board Certified Teacher!" scrolled across the screen.  The relief I felt was indescribable...a tangible weight was truly lifted.

Today I am also finishing assignments for my last class this semester, so I'm looking forward to a break for my cognitive self.  This journey through National Boards and my Master's so far has been completely on God's momentum.  I have felt inept, incompetent, unable, unworthy, and completely over-extended.  But my God is carrying me and has blessed me with an amazing support system.  "Not by might, nor by power, but by my Spirit says the Lord of hosts."

Thanksgiving in Wyoming 2012

After 18 hours of driving in Mom and Dad's RV (followed by their small car), we arrived in Casper for Thanksgiving with Grandma Marcia and Uncle Todd.  "We" included the Kernses, the Murrays, the Smiths, Snuffy, and Harmony.  The driving was rough, but the memories were worth it.  Thank you, God, for my amazing family who I love so much.  We are blessed.

Xena

My doggie, Xena Weena, went to heaven yesterday.  I will never forget her.  Off the top of my head...

• Chopping vines in front of 128 E. Willow with her little puppy self helping.
• Turbo circles in Granny and Grandpa's yard.
• Walkies at Lake Fort Smith.
• Walkies up and down the runway on Tate Road.
• Sharing her with the Smiths when we moved to Tate Road.
• Geriatric dogville at the Smiths (Sweetie, Rosie, Shep, Xena).
• Her dog box that she loved and exploded in and out of...

Xena, you were such a good doggie, and I will miss you.  I know you are happy running, bouncing, and playing in heaven.  You are special in my heart and I love you.

September 2012

So busy I'm numb...

18 hours done, 36 to go to finish my master's degree.  Working on that plus starting my new combo position at County Line: counseling + title 1 reading.  I'm prayerful, humble, and doing all I can to fulfill the responsibilities of my job descriptions.  I'm also anticipating my results from National Boards again in November. Please, God, let me be finished with that.  I'm also doing my best being a mom, wife, sister, daughter, and friend.  I think I'm probably just skimming the surface in all areas, but I'm just keeping on moving.  If I stop, I get paralyzed thinking about it all.

Right now I am procrastinating.  I have assignments to do for my classes, and I'm avoiding them.  Gotta just do it.  Tori and Adrion are with Nonna and Pops tonight.  The house is very quiet...

Closing This Door

After some updates on life at present for us Kernses, I am going back underground...AKA offline.  Blogging here has been fun and therapeutic, but I'm ready to close this "open book".  What a blessed journey this life is.

Garon:  35.  4 years now at USA Truck, and has taken on multiple management hats after another supervisor had a terrible accident a few weeks back...(On his way to Fort Smith from Springdale, "Phil" came upon an accident.  He got out of his vehicle to help and was hit by another car.  He is now recovering after multiple surgeries...many breaks from the waist down, plus broken arm, plus 300+ stitches to head, and I don't know what else.)  I love my G, and I am thankful that he is a husband who loves his family and works hard to provide for us.  After all this time together, I'm still crazy about him.

Me:  32.  Thanks to Grandma Marcia, I am back in college working toward  my master's in counseling.  Next year (2012-2013 school year) I will be part-time Title 1 Reading teacher for 3rd-6th grade and part-time counselor for K-6.  My schooling and career have been orchestrated by God from the get-go, and I am amazed to look back at how He has led me from a spirit of discontent to a place where I want to be still.  County Line has been (and I know will continue to be) one of the greatest blessings in my life.  The people and culture there have grown more and more precious to me, and though I've fought it, I am coming to accept it as a place to grow roots. 

Tori:  10.  Wow, my Tori.  She is my light and my constant challenge. So smart, so sweet, so special.  God's Grace..Reflection on her story is hard for this mama's heart.  I'm profoundly in love with her, and I thank God for entrusting us with her.  5th grade next year, fixated right now on dolphins and Perry the Platypus, and loves life.  She is vibrant, playful, inquisitive, beautiful.  She does not love math, and we'll be working on that this summer.  What a girl...

Adrion:  4.  My spunky, rambunctious, tender-hearted, precious little boy.  He loves his mama, and the feeling is mutual.  He started pre-K at County Line the last three weeks of school to guarantee a spot next year.  More blessings...next year my two kids will be with me where we will work and learn together.  Awesome...His favorites right now are Buzz Lightyear, the Power Rangers, and his blankies.  He is also very interested in outer space and rockets. 

And that's a brief picture of us in this fleeting moment of time.  I look forward to what's next with an open mind and a humble heart.  In my spiritual journey right now, here is where my heart is:

Colossians 3

English Standard Version (ESV)

Put On the New Self

3  If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. ²  Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. ³ For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. ⁴ When Christ who is your^[a] life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.

⁵  Put to death therefore what is earthly in you:^[b] sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. ⁶  On account of these the wrath of God is coming.^{[c] 7}  In these you too once walked, when you were living in them. ⁸ But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. ⁹  Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self^[d] with its practices ¹⁰ and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. ¹¹  Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave,^[e] free; but Christ is all, and in all.
¹²  Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, ¹³  bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. ¹⁴ And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. ¹⁵ And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. ¹⁶ Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. ¹⁷ And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

Spring Orchestra...

...from my iphone...no image (except neighbor's light), so just for your listening pleasure...

Spring Is Coming!